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Top 5 Goals for 2009

By John | November 16, 2008

Plan 09 from

Typically around this time of year folks start thinking about what their goals are for the next year. Not me, I am usually thinking about College Football’s national champion and what I am going to get for Christmas. However, this year things have changed a little bit and since my blog site has achieved a modicum of respect people have been asking me things like what is the plan for 2009? The first couple of times I tried to ignore their question but they won’t seem to go away. In fact even last week a highly respected blog-o-buddy of mine started telling me his 2009 execution plan. Then he asked me, What’s the johnmwillis 2009 plan looking like? He was already assuming I had one and it would have been extremely embarrassing to admit to him that I don’t have one. Therefore, in a possibly vain attempt to thwart of a potential onslaught of questions like this I have decided to officially launch my first ever “Plan 09 from” This way, hopefully, folk will stop asking me and I can get back to thinking about and watching college football again. So here goes:

Plan 09 Goals

  1. I want to increase domestic readership for my blog site. I appear to have a stronger concentration in Europe than in the US. After a little bit of analysis I realized that I have more high impact “No Country for Old IT Guys” pictures from outside of the United States of America. Therefore, I have decided to get some high impact shots from the USA this year. I am thinking I can start with getting a picture of John Wayne’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame sometime this year. This will accomplish to goals in one. First, I may be able to get more of those Silicon valley type (I’m hoping it could be a California kind of thing). Secondly, throwing a John Wayne “anything” should appeal to a lot of the red states which has not been a strong demographic for me in 2008.

  2. Oscar Wilde once said: “I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellect. A man cannot be to careful in the choice of his enemies.” I think I have had it backwards in 2008. I have made some great friends with some really smart people and maybe that has not been the best strategy. Furthermore, Valleyrag and Groundworks as enemies? Wilde would be rolling over in is grave. I need to do a lot better in choosing my enemies in 2009. Maybe Tim Oireilly or Nick Carr, or maybe go big with someone like Larry Eillison.

  3. This is another kill-two-birds with one stone action items. You heard it here first folks … In 2009 I will jump out of a plane. Before you get all, he’s mad, I am going to have to steal another quote from another great artist, Salvador Dali, ”The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad.“ There is a definite method to my madness on this one. I am almost certain that they will not let me jump out of a plane at my current weight. Therefore, before I can complete this action item, which will have to occur in 2009, I will have to loose weight first. Now if I happen to die whilst falling 20k feet then this item might all be for not, but as I always say “Nothing ventured, nothing ventured.”

  4. This one is a Biggy. For the last couple of years in my neighborhood, a few people have been taking their kids Trick-or-Treating to different houses using golf carts. Imagine that, golf carts? The first year I didn’t mind as much but, last year one guy had painted his cart in all Crimson and was blasting the Crimson Tide, Roll Tide, Roll Tide fight song from speakers attached to the cart. To steal another brilliant quote from a pure genius: “This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand, man” Jeff Lebowski. In “Plan 09 from Johnmwillis” I “plan” on taking that guy down with the AubieMobile. Yes, an orange and blue cart that will blast the “War Eagle” fight song at disturbing decibels. What does the last two goals have to do with you ask? Come on, everything. Think how great of a post it would be, even better, posthumously, of me crashing to the ground after falling from 20k feet. Also, how cool would it be to have pictures of me crashing into the BamaMobile next year’s Halloween.

  5. If you would have forced me to describe the 2008 plan I would have told you that I did not have one. However, if you were persistent, for example put a gun to my head, I would have told you this. I want to buy an old ice cream truck and sell ice cream on Saturday mornings with my two boys. My main obsticale to this in 2008 was, of course, my wife. Let me tell you, if you guys think I am crazy, you should hear what she says. Anyway, a crippled economy and fierce subversive attacks from my wife and now what I believe might have been involvement from my dog Stevie Ray Vaughn, thwarted my attempts to accomplish this goal in 2008. I am still trying to track down Stevie’s involvement, however all I can say is “Et tu, Brute.” Don’t get me started on Stevie. I was the one who suggested we adopt him from that cage at Pet Smart. I was the one who came up with his really cool name and now just because I promised to my wife that I would walk him everyday he as turned on me   Anyway, I am rambling, I feel that with my best efforts, I shall be triumphant on this item in “Plan 09 from Johnmwillis”. Jingle Jingle Jingle.  Oh yeah, what does this have to do with Absolutely nothing, blogging is fun, however, spending quality time with your children is priceless.

Now please let me get back to watching College football “War Eagle!”

Topics: other, sillystory | 1 Comment »

One Response to “Top 5 Goals for 2009”

  1. Greg Ellison Says:
    December 28th, 2008 at 9:20 pm

    Good Luck on your 2009 goals. I have made my goals for 2009. If you want to read it then Click Here. Thanks Greg Ellison